I need some new terms for sex

[PBR]

I've been married long enough that I've used all the romantic "come ons" I know to try and get some lovin' from my wife.

"wanna ride the baloney pony?"

"Let's play hide the weenie"

"how about I bury the bone"

"Feel like bumpin' uglies?"

These old classics are now hitting only about 22% of the time...please hook me up with some new lines to help increase my proficiency.

 

[cnote]

drilling for oil

 

[asufan550]

parkin' the beef bus in tuna town

 

[Kabbagecough]

Let's join at the groin.

 

[OnePocket]

Let me sling up in ya

 

[NES]

Crushing Pussies(from The Heartbreak Kid)
Jerkoff inside you(what people do with prostitutes)
Tab A into Slot B(childrens say that)
Park my car in your garage(I think I said that when I was five)

 

[steaktartar]

older women PBR really appreciate when you tell tham you want to "plow the north 40"

 

[texansfan]

"bend Over Bitch"

 

[HAT]

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[billhill999]

Little good and plenty.

 

[Ego74]

[FONT=Courier New, Courier, mono]Doing the nasty, Hide the salami,bone, get some, get down, rock, ball, ride, rut, shag, bonk, boink, makin' bacon, bump uglies, horizontal hokey pokey, stir the macaroni, puttin' on the ritz, nooner (if at mid-day), hide the salami, ride the baloney pony, dork, rail, hit-in, horizontal mambo, Ride The Horsey, Loading The Cargo, Sink The Ship, Plant Your Tree, Play Ball, Foo-Foo, Downloading Your Software, Rocking The Boat, The Old In-And-Out, Hit The Bull's-Eye[/FONT]

 

[SlashednThrashed]

Slap the gap
White water shafting
Polish the pearl
Damming the beaver

 

[joeyfitzclick]

Bury the baldy fella.

 

[PublicsMoney]

Lets Do It!

 

[kingbill]

Some Moist Relief

 

[mlfp]

For the titty fans:
Dotting the I's and fucking the T's.

For the skull-fucking fans:
Crossing the T's and fucking the eyes.

 

[PBR]

You guys is alright. I tried steak's north 40 line and she rolled over like the Ravens on a Sunday night home game. Can't wait to toss out some more of these gems...this stuff is gold

 

[whalewager]

making sweet love

 

[PBR]

making sweet love

hmmm....tell me Mr. Wager, does this sincere, from the heart, Romeo and Juliet type of request produce any results?